I know, at times, you don’t think you can’t do this.

I know, at times, it seems like such a humungous waste of time and effort.

I know there are also times when you’ve wanted to curl up in to a ball and blink out of existence because, well, because it’s just you and what do you matter?

This is all well understood and, I might add, experienced in the first degree.

But…

Don’t forget that you got in.

Don’t forget that you have, on at least 5 occasions, learnt the impossible in less than a 24 hours.

Don’t forget that there are lots of people who look up to you for advice; for guidance; for understanding; for bus fare; who would not be where they are now if you hadn’t been there, at that moment, to help them along.

Don’t forget that, even now – sitting here, waiting for you to come home while the cats try to push me off both pillows in the sitting room – I’m still so god-damn proud of you and what you have achieved this year, and last, that it makes it all worth it.

Sure, I might have kicked you up the bum to get out there and made sure you had a packed lunch or whatever you needed to forget to try to have a disaster on the way, but you’re the one who’s doing it. It’s you.

Really. It’s all you. It really, really is.

X

Your Bitey-saurus

Not while the fire is raging around you. That’s when.

To have a really big fire
* There must be a spark to start it off;
* There has to be fuel to keep it going and;
* Something needs to fan it to get the flames as high as possible.

Imagine, for an instant, what it would be like if the Fire Department tried to find the cause of the blaze before they started to put it out. You house is on fire, people in fire fighting gear have turned up and in they go, to find the cause, rather than put it out. How many houses and people would be lost if things went that way?

Lots.

So, now go back and change “fire” to “argument” and “house” to “relationship”, it’s the same thing.

Just putting it out there…

I have recently noticed that, when getting the knifes and forks out for breakfast, I keep choosing my nice 100% metal, seriously sturdy cutlery. When I’m putting out the cat food, out come Emma’s pretty spoons.

Sooooo……

Yeah. I totally busted myself huh?

Really. The world doesn’t work like that.

Except when you make it that way.

Love,

Your husband.

X

Wow, there were times there that I thought we weren’t going to make it. Times when I couldn’t figure out how to help Emma, times when I couldn’t figure out how to help myself. Times when I thought that of all the things that I COULD do, none of them were going to get us out of the hole (I thought) we were in.

But then, there have been many many days like this one; where we talked about what we wanted and dared to share a little bit of the scary dreams we hadn’t really discussed with ourselves, let along each other. Easy days of rest and getting used to each other; allowing ourselves to be ourselves and, sort of, finding out what we are really like.

It’s going to be interesting to discover where we go from here. We have some “general outlines of the frame work of what we hope to accomplish” (plans) which sound crazy and a little bit wonky. Just like us.

Yeah; I think things are going to be just great!

We have to go pick up our guests from the airport.

On Friday Emma posted our house on the AirBnB, a quiet room in Perth, and 4 hours later she had her first enquiry. To arrive the next day and stay for two days.

So, after much hand wringing and e-mailing back and forth, Emma has approved the booking and now we are here, the day before our anniversary, getting in the car to pick up strangers from the airport.

It’s all going to be fine.

And it will be fun!

Wheeeeeeeeeeeee

B: “What would you like for dinner?”

E: “I don’t know, anything.”

<– cut –>

It’s 5-3-1 time! Person B has to make 5 suggestions, Person E gets to veto two of them, then Person B vetoes another two. The remaining option is the one you go with.

</– cut –>

B: “Nando’s, Subway, Maya Masala, Sumo-Salad, I.G.A.”

E: “Not I.G.A. and not Nando’s; we went there yesterday.”

B: “Okay. Not Subway. Not Sumo-Salad.”

E: “Maya Masala it is then!”

<– cut –>

It’s great because:

• We both get to veto two items.
• The person who didn’t want to decide, ends up saying the answer (which is like pseudo-deciding)
• The person asking the question has to come up with 5 options to start with (as opposed to none when asking the first question)

</– cut –>

We have successfully trialed this game and found it to be both easy to play and very effective.

I’m losing weight.

For as long as I can remember, I have been (within 700g of) 78kg. It’s really frustrating. For me.

A couple of months back we tried not eating any grains for an entire month. We both lost weight. We both had more energy and we both think that it was easier to not fly off the handle during that month. I found out about it via Tim Ferriss’ blog and was very happy that we tried it out. Only problem was; we just sort of tried it out; we didn’t measure anything and tried to stick to the plan, but weren’t too phased when we didn’t. Well, Emma did spend a bit of time feeling guilty, but that’s her favourite past-time.

So I have been very interested in Tim’s new book The 4 Hour Body. Great read, I highly recommend it for people who want to see things differently.

So, I’m doing a new experiment:

The Slow Carb Diet

• Avoid “white” carbohydrates (Wheat, Sugar, Potato, Corn, Quinoa)
• Celebrate Festivus once every week (consume as much, of whatever, as you want) [We party on Saturdays]

It’s not easy to follow, and I have paraphrased it down to the fundamentals because Tim makes some great suggestions as rules that are really reiterations of the first rule.

I did this for two weeks, went from 77.9kgs –> 73.9kgs and watched the fluctuations when I deviated from the plan. My body fat is now 6.9%. This part works!

So now, I’m going from Geek to Freak.

Target: 90kgs of raw Ben.

Same basic diet, but lots more protein. I went to the gym today, it was pretty entertaining. I am sure I looked mighty thin in the mirrors-of-self-love lining the long wall. Another fortnight and we’ll see who’s sneering at who, Conan.

Elmo is Love
Grover is Bravery
Ernie and Bert are Friendship
Big Bird is Innocence
Oscar the Grouch is Independence

Kermit is Responsibilitiy
Miss Piggy is Determination
Gonzo is Joy
Fozzie is Fortitude
Scooter is Consistency
Rowlf is Wisdom
Statler and Waldorf are Nostalgia
Bunsen Honeydew is Experimentation
The Swedish Chef is Entropy
Sam the Eagle is Truth
Dr. Teeth is Jubilation
Animal is Tumultous

and, of course,

The Count is Counting