Posts from ‘expectations’
50 things I want to do before I die
I watch a TV show called Dance Academy. It is meant for teenagers but I really enjoy it. It is simple, it has dancing and singing in it and on occasion it makes me think more about the life I am living. The last episode that I saw concerned one of the boys in the main group being hit by a car and ultimately dying. I cried….like a baby….anyway that isn’t the point of this post! After he passed away his friends found a list of fifty things that he had wanted to accomplish before he died, and while he didn’t complete all of them he had made a pretty good crack at a lot of them.
This got me thinking. What do I want to achieve before I die? We get a limited time on this earth so I want to make sure I do everything that I want to. I decided I should write a list of my own. It includes some massively big and outrageous ideas alongside some very plain and boring ones. This list doesn’t include everything. I’m sure as I tick one item off the list another thing will take its place. They are also in no particular order, other than the order of which I thought of them and wrote them down.
- Sing on the Burswood stage in a professional show
- Go watch an Olympic Games live in person
- Learn to speak another language with some proficiency
- Record an album
- Perform in the West End
- Perform on Broadway
- Meet Bernadette Peters and Lea Salonga
- Be the voice of a Disney character
- Raise a happy family
- Live in another country
- Decorate my entire house with Christmas lights
- Have a white Christmas
- Go to every Disney theme park in the world
- Sing the national anthem at an AFL Grand Final
- Travel the world
- Play the role of Eponine or Fantine in Les Miserables
- Go to Rottnest
- Travel on a ship
- Perform in a professional opera
- Perform in a professional musical
- Go to an opening night VIP party
- Write a book
- Visit Broadway
- Visit the West End
- Attend the Tony awards
- Build my own home
- Stay in the penthouse of a five star hotel
- Go camping under the stars with Ben
- Swim with dolphins
- Take a roadtrip with no plans
- Have a dog named Wilbur
- Walk through town in a costume for no reason at all
- Sew my own gown
- Stand on top of the Sydney Harbour Bridge
- Spend a Summer backpacking
- Volunteer in another country
- Visit Africa and see the African animals
- Write a song
- Get a standing ovation
- Visit Rome and see the Pope
- Have a hobby farm which we can live off
- See an Opera in the Sydney Opera House
- See an Opera in the Paris Opera House
- Sing in public for no reason at all
- Change someones life for the better
- Believe in myself and my own talents
- Leave a scholarship in my name
- Make a best friend who I can grow old with
- Sing on the stage of His Majesty’s Theatre
- Attend a concert in Carneige Hall
In ten years time I will look back again just as I did in the post preceding this, but what will I see? The scary thing is that what I will see will be entirely dependant on me. It will depend on the choices I make, the determination I show, the commitment I have and the dedication I prove. At the moment I can dream and I dream that I will fulfill my goals of:
- being a professional singer
- learn to speak a foreign language with proficiency
- have a family
- travel the world
- be happy
Whether these things come about though is dependant on my choices, determination, commitment and dedication. If I keep these dreams at the forefront of my mind and apply myself without excuse then there is no reason why I should look back in ten years and be disappointed with the life that I have chosen to live.
Last year Ben wrote a post which looked at the year that had gone by. It was a good opportunity to look back on the year, our achievements and our expectations for the coming year.
So this year I would like to write my own review:
The high-lights
- Survived being married for a whole year and a bit!
- Completed and passed WAAPA to an amazing standard
- Ben and I worked together on our first musical (I was in it and he worked the lights)
- Travelled to France and Switzerland, and survived!
Other successes
- Continued to save money by watching my spending (saved enough to spoil Ben with a trip to Japan for his birthday)
- Housing arrangements (Somehow we still have the two houses despite me only working casually)
- Made our first friends as a couple (Nicole and Stephen you are amazing!)
- Conversations on the increase (arguments are on the decline – still)
- I made some new friends and removed lots of the negativity from my life (Year of Happiness!)
- Started working for two new companies with varying results but on the whole very satisfied with my work arrangements
Stuff we hope to learn something from
- It is okay to change the plans
- Family is great.
- If you work hard it will always pay off in some form
Unmentionable things like
- Emma has now finished University and now has to take herself seriously as a singer
- Ben still works for a company that doesn’t deserve him
Well the silly season has ended and it is a new year, well it has been for over a week now but this is the first time I have had the motivation to write on here! A new year means new opportunities, new experiences and new expectations for the year. About this time last year I wrote out my expectations for the year. It was a list of things I wanted to achieve, not New Year’s resolutions more intentions. Things that I intend to do because I want to do them not because I feel on some level that I should. So the time has come to have some new expectations for myself for the year 2012.
Work on my singing and treat myself as a professional singer.
What does this mean?
It means I have to put in the effort if I want to turn out to be a successful singer of any kind. That means I will have to practice every day and practice in a meaningful way.
What will it look like?
Every day you will see me practising my singing. I will also work on my music theory and keyboard skills so I can improve as a musician. It will also mean that I will be working professionally as a singer. This year I will get my first professional contract.
Continue to work on my language studies, with a bit more focus than in the past.
What does this mean?
In the past I have gone to my French lessons and completed the bare minimum to stay up with the class. This year I want to study harder. I want to become more proficient as a speaker of French. I would also like to start Italian lessons during the year.
What will it look like?
Every day I will complete activities in French. I will also continue to attend classes at the Alliance Francais. If I have the opportunity to interact with French speakers I will speak French to them and not resort to English first.
Save money for the future, whether that be babies, moving house, travel or singing expenses.
What does this mean?
I would like to build up a small amount of money so that if we want to go travelling or I need to go to Melbourne for an audition than I don’t have to worry about it. I would also like to have some money saved to help support us in the event that we finally start having babies.
What will it look like?
I have opened a new account specifically for saving. It rewards me with extra interest each month that I don’t take money out but I do deposit money. I am going to aim to deposit $100 every Friday morning into the account.
Look after my body.
What does this mean?
I don’t always do the best things for my body. I eat junk including a lot of sugar. I would like to improve my health through watching what I eat. I would also like to lose some of my unwanted weight, some of which will be lost through change of diet the rest I hope to lose through exercising more efficiently.
What will it look like?
You will see me eating healthier food and exercising. I am going to try and follow the diet Ben went on last year. It wasn’t really a diet but more a change in the food I eat and when. It isn’t a difficult thing to follow if I truly want to look after my body.
Travel more.
What does this mean?
Without a doubt one of the best parts of 2011 was travelling with Ben to France. This year we already have a trip planned for Bali at the end of January and a trip to Japan for around April / May. I would love to travel as much as possible with Ben this year and maybe even by myself.
What will it look like?
I would love to do another big trip this year with Ben in addition to the two short trips of Bali and Japan. I will need to save money and look out for flight specials but I would hope that at the end of this year Ben and I will be experiencing our third trip of the year.
Spend meaningful time with Ben.
What does this mean?
Ben and I spend a lot of time together but I want to spend more meaningful time with Ben. I want to do things that are active and leave us both feeling better for it.
What will it look like?
We will continue to do the things we already do together like eating our meals together and watching silly shows on iView but we will also spend time out of the house, spending time with friends and family. Being kind to each other and enjoying each other’s company.
I had a singing lesson today and I feel just as lost as I did two days ago. What am I doing? I feel like I am pinning all my hopes of a career as a singer on this one audition. Ben is telling me to be positive, focus on the audition and do the best I can. To an extent that is exactly what I am doing but where do I draw the line between believing in myself and my abilities and over committing to the one idea? This isn’t a sure thing. I might not get in. I’m not being negative, I’m being realistic. What is the back-up plan?
I feel as if I have no direction, no safety net, no plan, no idea of anything! I’m really confused about everything. The worst part is I can’t really talk to Ben about it. Every time I say that I am worried he just says “Don’t be! There is nothing to worry about.” If I say “But what if I don’t get in?” He immediately jumps to the conclusion that I have given up already and I have resorted to a mindset of negativity. I honestly haven’t but I am not going to sit naively thinking that everything in my future is laid out nicely because it’s not. There is a very real possibility that I won’t get in just as much as there is a real possibility that I will get in.
I’ve lost my stability is the problem. I don’t have a job, I don’t have a course I’m studying and I don’t have anything on the horizon except an audition that may or may not go ahead. This sucks. I feel happy one moment and very confused and lost the next.
I need patience….and a plan.
