Posts from ‘family’
Annual Review 2010
So here we are, end of the year and it’s time to check back on the stated objectives and their results. I picked up this idea via The Art of Non-Conformity, although it’s a common enough theme at this time of year.
The high-lights
- Got married!
- WAAPA
- Nine, the musical
- Survived school and The Gum-nuts
Other successes
- Shopping for clothes (in the second hand/recycling boutiques of the world)
- Housing arrangements (We have two, still)
- Conversations on the increase (arguments are on the decline)
- Emma paid off huge chunks of her loan (in fact, it’s all gone now because I was sick of listening to her whinge about how impossible everythingnwas going to be while the loan loomed large above her)
Stuff we hope to learn something from
- Getting hot makes things difficult for us.
- Family is great.
- Just cause you didn’t get the job doesn’t mean your life is over.
Unmentionable things like
- The fact that I still haven’t got around to building the amazing web app I intended to make this time last year.
- Emma is getting shorter, or more precisely, continues to wear flat shoes more often than I would like.
What a difference an oven made
Twenty-four little notes
Brought the buns and the power
Where there used to be blameMy yesterday was stew, dear
Today I’m using you, dear
My frypan nights are through, dear
Since he said you were fineWhat a difference an oven makes
There’s cookie-dough before me
Skies above can’t be stormy
Since that moment of glee, that thrilling degreeIt’s heaven when you find roast on your menu
What a difference an oven made
And the difference is you
After finally calling an electrician to come look at the oven, they have replaced the $75 thingo around the back that had melted and it’s working perfectly. Now I’ll just start baking some muffins so that when Emma gets home she will be greeted with the small of baked goods…
This one is quite funny to write; I remember having a similar issue when this happened to me and so it echoes quite nicely.
For a while now I have been encouraging Emma to keep an eye out for cheap flights to places we might like to go. For holidays, as opposed to places we might like to go to get away from the in-laws, which would be a completely horrible suggestion and totally unwarranted. “Hello to Emma’s family”, I know many of you read this :-)
So, over time, we have had the occasional conversation about dream holiday locations, logistics and timing. Largely these took the form of a tentative suggestion that could be construed as something completely different (have you ever wanted to go to Disneyland) which, upon further investigation, rapidly descended into either hurt silence or stomping footsteps towards a door. Oh, it wasn’t just her. We swapped roles at regular intervals.
So it was quite a surprise to get a jittery phone call from Emma that started out with, “Honey, I’ve found some flights to Paris next year that look really good, can we go?” i would like to say that i answered suavely, “Sure, Baby, what ever you want”, but that would be a misrepresentation of the facts. There was some confusion as we tried to fall back into the old pattern, but after realising what was happening, I tried a different tact and, within 24 hours, Things Were Different!
Emma had figured out the connecting flights, arranged a stop over and paid (with my plastic to get the travel insurance) for the entire escapade.
I’m pretty sure she is still not quite sure when the piano will fall on her, but it’s very amusing to watch her try to get grumpy now. All I have to do to dislodge any cranky is start humming the French National Anthem.
And now she is starting to think that maybe, just maybe, things will turn out alright for her after all.
Highly, HIGHLY amusing.
You are in the next room, head on a pillow, eyes closed to the troubles around you. Sticky, warm air enters and leaves across the lips I love to kiss. Behind your brow a mind slowly ticks away, letting go of another day that was difficult for us.
On the outside we look happy. In public places we are smiling. Behind closed doors the troubles are easier to see. The cracks begin to form and slowly begin to show. Stress presses on us and we slowly break apart.
You don’t let me go despite how I try. A part of me struggles against your strength while the rest cries out to hold you closer. There are three of us fighting, two who want to stay and one who seeks to destroy all we have made.
When the third is gone and the darkness she brings with her evaporates, we are beautiful. We laugh together, hope together, hold together. This is the way we are meant to be. This is the way I want us to be.
I am stronger than her. Stronger than the self depreciating girl I try to be. I believe in myself more now than ever before. You are showing me the way but I know it exhausts you. So for now you are resting.
You are in the next room, head on a pillow, eyes closed to the troubles around you. Sticky, warm air enters and leaves across the lips I love to kiss. Behind your brow a mind slowly ticks away, dreaming of another day that will be beautiful for us.
And I hope…
The last few weeks Ben and I have been pushing ourselves a little too hard. Currently I am performing in a production of “Fiddler on the Roof”, while also choreographing the musical “Nine”. Ben has been coming along to “Nine” rehearsals to help out and this has often resulted in him helping out on nights when I am not there too. What this has added up to is two very tired people.
It is production week this week for both shows, they both had their preview tonight and they both open on Friday. As you can imagine there have been a lot of last minute rehearsals happening in a desperate attempt to get things ‘perfect’. This week alone we have been to one rehearsal or the other (or in the case of Sunday both) every day. It has gotten to the point now though when we need to stop. The exhaustion has set in. It is time for a break.
I think the worse thing in all this is that Ben and I don’t seem to be spending as much time together as we usually do. We have also taken to sleeping in separate beds because we seem to get better sleep when there isn’t another body in the bed, and with sleep eluding us we will take what we can get. It isn’t ideal but it works.
I miss waking up and having our slow sleepy mornings together, sharing breakfast together and talking about the day.
I miss coming home at night and spending time unwinding, listening to music, going to the movies or watching a video.
Most of all I miss Ben. We don’t haven’t seen each other much the last two weeks. Hopefully once the shows open we can get back to being awesome together. Because we are pretty damn awesome.
