Posts Tagged ‘learning’
Noah and the Great Flood: A Lesson
Being a religious girl, I know the story of Noah and the Great Flood very well. For those who don’t know the story go read it now before you go any further. So the whole point, or moral of the story was that the people of Earth were squandering the life they had been so graciously given by God , so God decided to wash the Earth clean and start a new.
Yesterday Perth was hit with sort of a mini Noah’s flood of sorts. Below is a photo of an actual street in Atwell.
Image by Jarrad Lawrence (facebook)
The storm hit at around 4:00pm, a time when I would normally be coming home, except for yesterday. I had an appointment with the doctor at 2:00pm so had left school early and then gone to my parents place at around 3:00pm because they wanted to talk to me about wedding plans. If I had done my usual routine I would have been caught right in the middle of the storm, my car would now be damaged and I would have been seriously risking my safety by driving home. As chance would have it I was safe in my parent’s house and my car only got one dent in it as opposed to my parents car which looks a lot like the one below, cellulite anyone?
Image by Cali Graham (facebook)
Anyway, so while alone at my parent’s place things started going a little crazy. The house started flooding. First it came through the front door, then it starting coming in through the windows and eventually the roof. At one point I emptied the buckets collecting water under one window to find myself pouring twenty litres down the drain, and that was only after ten minutes of collecting. I even had to rescue my mums dog from attempting to hang himself on the fence when the hail, thunder and lightning got too much for him and he tried a very bold escape plan, jumping the fence, despite him being several kilograms overweight and not at all athletic beyond a light trot.
I learnt later from Ben that our house had suffered a similar fate. We now have a smashed roof, flooded downstairs room and water damage to belongings.
What came out of this event though was the realisation that through everything, despite how much water was coming in, or how much damage we were sure to find in the morning, the one thing that mattered the most was that our loved ones were safe.
Ben and I called each other to make sure we were okay and to keep each other updated, because I was further north than him I could tell him if the storm was letting up or getting worse before he attempted to go anywhere. Mum and Dad called to check that my niece and nephew, who live with them, had got home safely from school and tried to contact my sister, who was stranded at UWA (see below that is hail you can see, not snow) to make sure she was safe. Even after the storm Mum called all my brothers and sisters to see if they were okay.
UWA James Oval
Image by Ben Corry (Flickr)
No one rang to find out if their computer was okay, or if the television had been saved, it was just genuine concern for the truly important things in life, because at the end of the day; a car, a television, even a house, can be replaced but a loved one can’t be.
This event also sparked a turning point for me. Noah’s flood was an opportunity for the people of Earth to see what they were doing with their lives and start to make a change, to focus on the important things and not the things that we ‘think’ are important. I’m going to try giving this a go.
I’m going to make more time for loved ones, for collecting memories instead of possessions and to do the things that are important to me, like getting out of bed in the morning and going for my run no matter how tired or cranky I am or how windswept and debris filled the streets are. It is time to take this new beginning and use it to make something worthwhile.
I find it hard to listen.
I didn’t come to this realisation easily. It was only recently, in fact, that I accepted the above statement. I was reading through a workbook we were given at the Catholic Marriage Education Services course last weekend.
From the book (which they got from somewhere else):
When I ask you to listen to me and you start giving advice; you have not done what I asked.
When I ask you to listen to me and you begin to tell me why I shouldn’t feel that way; you are trampling on my feelings.
When I ask you to listen to me and you feel you have to do something to solve my problem; you have failed me, strange as that may seem.
Listen!
All I asked was that you listen, not talk or do – just hear me.
Advice is cheap and I can do for myself; I’m not helpless.
When you do something for me that I can and need to do for myself; you contribute to my fear and weakness.
But,
when you accept as a simple fact that I do feel what I feel, no matter how irrational, then I can quit trying to convince you and can get about the business of understanding what’s behind this irrational feeling. And, when that’s clear, the answers are obvious and I don’t need advice.Irrational feelings make sense when we understand what’s behind them.
So please listen and just hear me. And if you want to talk, wait a minute for your turn; And I’ll listen to you.
[I changed some punctuation and emphasis, but it's essentially the same. There are many versions on the internet]
So yesterday I practised when Emma was telling me about how she felt. I found it really difficult to just accept what she was saying and respond in kind. I’m not sure how the whole thing was received and problaby won’t be for a few days or weeks, but I’m going to give it more time.
Obviously I need more practise!
Image by fofurasfelinas (flickr).
Ben has been giving me the following advice for a long time now and it has been incredibly difficult for me to understand let alone apply. It wasn’t until two days ago when I had an awful lesson with one of my classes that I realised the truth behind this advice and how applicable this advice was to my life. I could finally start to take the first steps to apply it.
These kids I was teaching had no comprehension of taking control of their lives. They were content with blaming all their misfortune on others leaving them to feel guilt free. They had no direction, no understanding of what a gift they had been given. I started dispensing the following advice, advice that Ben had given me, and at the moment it started to click for them it also clicked for me.
The only person in this world who can change your life is you. Everything that happens to you in your life is a direct result of a choice you made. Think about what power this realisation can hold for you. You have the power to change your life into something you can be proud of.
1. Who am I?
2. What is important to me?
3. What do I want to do with my life?
If you can answer these three questions with conviction then you can start to change your life. you can begin to live the life you want to live, instead of the life you believe you are expected to live.
Nothing is impossible.
Take the time to reflect on these three questions. What would your answers be?
Within the classroom the kids started to think that this was another “What do you want to be when you grow up” lessons. They were reluctant until they started thinking beyond the classroom walls. It was interesting to hear what real dreams they have for their lives. Dreams beyond “I want to be a mechanic”. There were honest thoughts coming out and they stopped thinking about what they thought I wanted to hear and concentrated more on what they wanted to say. It was a wonderful breakthrough.
Image by Paolo Margari (flickr)
I used to talk to People With Children as if they had all been reading the same book: The Talking To People Without Kids book. They would tell me about kindergarten, injections, clothes and various forms of liquid waste. It was quaint and a bit boring.
Now I find myself paying special attention to them. Especially how they relate to their children. How they deal with different situations and what that seems to say about them and their offspring. Mostly I’m applying my understanding of the world to their situation. Which is totally unfair, but rather entertaining; in an It’s going to happen to you too, buddy! kind of way.
I know that my perspective is going to change as the day-to-day challenges morph from Help Emma to Help Emma and the baby to just Help!, as most of the parents I have talked to have delighted in telling me. However, what do they know?
They made their decisions and stuck with it – bully for them! – but are those decisions the right ones for us? It’s hard to tell. They seem to be taking rational and well thought out control of their lives. They seem to be doing a right thing (as opposed to THE right thing, which no-one will be particularly specific on) and that seems to be working out okay. I mean;
- their kids are alive (and that’s good, right?)
- their kids seem normal (but what’s normal?)
- their lives are fairly uncomplicated (Are the kids asleep? Okay, let’s take a break!)
- they are pretty happy (but a little sad at having lost their old sense of freedom)
- everything finishes at 7pm (The kids need to go to sleep)
So what’s the problem?
Everyone has an opinion. For each person who says, “Go Left!”, I can find someone who says, “Go Right!”. This isn’t advice, it’s propaganda!
I have a feeling that no matter what book/person/gypsy I consult the only person who has the answer is me.
And that makes me a responsible parent (to be).
Oh. I get it.
Image by marklarsen (Flickr).
