Posts Tagged ‘learning’
I’m having trouble eating
Okay so that’s not entirely true. I have never had trouble eating, if I was to be perfectly honest I enjoy eating a little too much. On my Year Four school camp I won the award for being “The camp garbage disposal” it was even captioned with a little smiling garbage can with the speech bubble “Excuse me, can I finish what’s on your plate?” Yes I did ask people that and I continue to do so but at least my mother taught me two things 1. to use my manners and 2. to not waste food.
The real trouble I am having at the moment is this diet that Ben is advocating. It is a great diet, I can see huge changes in him already, when I stick to it I too am amazed at the weight loss that is happening along with the increased energy levels. The problem though is that I was brought up on an Irish man’s diet of potato, bread, gravy and meat. In this list I am not allowed to eat the first three items if I were to stick to the diet’s “rules”. As a consequence I often find myself cheating some what.
Last week it was bread and dip before dinner at the pub with some friends, Valentine’s day we had love heart pizza (see the picture, it was awesome), orientation day at university I had a sausage sizzle lunch (it was free and yes I could have just eaten the sausage but I didn’t want to look like the dancers who were just smelling the sausages and not actually eating them). It seems that bread and wheat is incredibly ingrained in everyday life for me. The ability for me to say “no” is still developing.
So I am trying the diet. It is proving to be difficult. I have cheated on multiple times. I haven’t cheated today so far so I’m going to make today “DAY ONE” and start again from scratch. In addition to the diet I am also exercising more, hopefully every day if I can stick to it. In four weeks I want to look like the dance girls at university; happy, healthy and flexible. I can do it.
I have a friend who is going through some tough times at the moment and, during the course of some email tennis, there are a few paragraphs that I think bare repeating.
Would you change him, so that you could keep him? If you were to forgive what seems unforgivable (and believe me, it is forgivable, but maybe not just yet) and continue from roughly where you left off, what would you have to change, in your deeply held beliefs about relationships, so that you could REALLY be back in the relationship?
A lot huh?
About the same amount of things you’ll have to change to have your next serious relationship with whomever comes along.
Coupled with…
Know that when you are in a relationship, you choose to be in it and there will always be unexpected stuff coming at you. It is the nature of a relationship between two (or more) people that things will not go “as planned” and so, as you get more experienced with being in relationships, you stop making plans and stick to a generally agreed upon “basic outline” that can be reviewed at any time all members are together.
It has taken me, personally, ~15 years to figure this out and, while I think I’ve got it mostly worked out, I know that I could also have it completely wrong. While I am not exactly “fine” with that, I am okay with the idea that it doesn’t matter so much, as long as I am willing to throw out my old ideas and learn something new when the situation requires it.
I don’t really have much to add, outside of the context of the situation, other than: Relationships are curious things, the more I have the more I realise how much more there is to learn about them.
When I was in high school there were a number of people in my year group who could speak more than one language. They would speak one language predominately at home when around their family and another language when they were at school amongst there friends. It was pretty cool to watch and listen to and I was always envious of those people who could do that. I was also very curious as to how it was done. My curiosity has now been fed.
I mentioned in my last post that Ben and I went to visit a friend of his. This woman is amazing. Not only does she have two kids but she also performs, something that I one day hope to do also. What I didn’t mention though was the fact that she is Russian while her husband in of Chinese descent.
As parents they have made a conscious decision to have their children grow up to be bi-lingual. The mother only speaks to the children in Russian while the father speaks to them in English. It was fascinating to listen to especially as their three year old sat next to me on the couch and proceeded to babble to me in a combination of both.
I was at a loss for words. I understood parts fo what she was saying to me but for the most part I may as well have been talking to a puppy. She would look at me longingly, clearly not understanding the idea that I didn’t speak Russian, and why would she when the majority of the people she spent time with could speak Russian to her and understand every word that she was saying back.
I really want my children to grow up being able to speak more than one language. This year as part of my studies at university I have to learn a language. I have chosen French as I have done a little bit of it in the past, hopefully I stick with it and do well. I want to do well. Now I have a bigger goal, not only for myself but for my future kids too.
Five months!!! Ben and I have been married for five months, well actually a little bit longer if you want to get pedantic about it, but WOW! That seems huge. So why the sudden realisation? We attended our first wedding as a married couple together on the weekend, and it was beautiful. It also helped us to revisit what was a very special day for us.
Everyone says that you don’t remember much of your wedding day. It all goes by so fast and most events throughout the day become a blur. It’s true. A lot of our wedding was a blur of meeting people, smiling for photographers and attempting to get fed. Sitting back and B & D’s wedding gave us the opportunity to remember the more important things that happened on our day.
Firstly our vows. I loved the way B & D wrote their own vows. It was cute and heartfelt and very “them”. Ben and I didn’t write our own vows, but we still made the same promises. We vowed to love, honor and cherish each other. We promised to find the good in each other and work together as a family. Hearing B & D make these same promises reminded us of what we had said on that day. It also helped us to put into perspective all the troubles we have been through in the past year and realise that we are doing a damn good job upholding those vows.
The ceremony was beautiful. They tried to make it very individual with things that were uniquely them. They had a hand fasting ceremony and even set aside a time for their daughter A to be welcomed as part of the family. It was well thought through and made the day even more special. I think that is important. We shouldn’t get caught up in trying to do what everyone else has done and do it our own way. I think when Ben and I got married that we successfully did the things we wanted to do.
I guess really I am just feeling a little squishy and sentimental. I am very happy I married Ben.
Image by TiffanyDawnPhoto (Flickr)
I don’t know if it is the change in the weather, the near completeness of knowing what I am going to be doing next year in regards to study or the realisation that I am only seven weeks, three days and one period away from having completed the school year, but I feel great and have felt great for the past few days. Add to that a new diet which Ben and I are experimenting with and all together it is adding up to make a much more stable me.
So what exactly has changed?
1. I had my audition on Sunday morning for entry into WAAPA’s classical music course. They said I had a “very pretty” voice and could see a lot of potential. They suggested that I start with the certificate course and then go on to the post-graduate course depending on how my voice progresses. Another footnote is that I should start learning German, Italian and French next year to help with when I get to the post-graduate studies. I have been wanting to learn a language for a while and have been on and off for some time. Hopefully with the motivation of university I will stick with it a little more and push myself. It is very exciting.
2. The change in the weather is great. I am finding it easier to get out of bed in the morning and go to sleep at night. I’m not nearly as tired as I once was and am finding that I want to be out exercising, which is helping me achieve my goal of losing some weight and getting my flexibility and strength back.
3. School is nearly over. I no longer have my year 12 class which has given me five extra periods a week to get things done. While the last week has been mostly spent on getting organised for the term, I am finding that I have more time for marking and doing things for myself like writing and practicing singing. I am going to feel such a sense of relief when I leave here.
4. The new diet. Ben and I are trying a no wheat diet. I was dead set keen when he suggested it but after a couple of days I was whinging about not being able to eat my favorite foods like pasta or bread. Now though I am finding that I am losing weight much easier than I was before, I have more energy and I am getting more creative with what I eat instead of relying on staples of pasta for dinner and eggs on toast for breakfast. It is hard but I am enjoying the results.
I am excited about the future again. This is about the same time last year when I found out I was pregnant. I didn’t think I would feel this positive again after we lost the baby, but I am surprised to find that I am. I have a good future to look forward to again. Eating well, exercising and enjoying exercising, singing everyday and learning new things. And all of this with Ben by my side.
I’m excited!
Image by Rammorrison (Flickr)
